This is a testimony of a teenage girl whose heart was broken, whose faith grew cold, but was embraced and forgiven by God.
I was 14 when I met God. I was invited by a classmate to attend one of their church activities. I felt blessed and surprised when I saw a worship leader way younger than me leading the congregation in worship.
Fast forward, months have passed and I became part of the worship team. I was so happy! It sets me on fire to be with young people who were also on fire for God. I was active attending all the church gatherings. Until one day, I fell in love with our keyboardist. Every night and day we were chatting online. Later on, he confessed his feelings for me. I was surprised! Not long after that, he became my boyfriend.
At first, our relationship was hidden. We didn’t want them to know about it. But because we were too obvious, our church-mates and pastor have had noticed it. As time went on, we fell more in love with each other. But we would always have arguments and jealousy. Our relationship was not healthy. I admit, the Lord was never in the center of our relationship.
Unexpectedly, when we got to the 8th month of our relationship, we broke up… he broke up with me. I was so hurt… and because of that, I left my ministry and I stopped attending church. Though sometimes, I would try, but every time I see him, I would feel so down. My relationship with God turned cold. And all the thoughts running in my head were all negative which made me go back to my old life.
I could not accept everything that had happened. My church-mates would try to reach out to me, talk to me, and give me some advice, but I won’t listen to them. One time, I decided to attend in the prayer meeting. All of them were weeping and praying. While I was just sitting in silence with my eyes closed and God talked to me. He showed me different things. First, he brought me back to the time when I was joyfully serving Him. Then, He showed me my spiritual family and the ministry where He wanted to use me. Seeing all those, I broke in tears and He told me, “My child, you rushed things out.” He made me realize that I am still young and that there is a time for everything. He also convicted me of prioritizing my relationship with ‘that guy’ than my relationship with Him. That time, I felt His embrace and forgiveness.
It is true that our heart is deceitful above all things (Jeremiah 17:9). We should wait for the right time and go through the right process. Yes, time will come that we will be in relationship, but we have to make God the center of it. And when you get hurt, always remember that it’s not the end. Let us completely trust God and learn to wait on the right time.